Caesar
Footballguy
Followed this up the next day withCaesar said:Me: "Daddy's losing weight"
5 year old: "you're trying to be not fat?"
Her twin: "but I like you like that!"
"Daddy's supposed to be a circle, but he's losing weight."
Followed this up the next day withCaesar said:Me: "Daddy's losing weight"
5 year old: "you're trying to be not fat?"
Her twin: "but I like you like that!"
Sounds eerily similar to a conversation I might have with my wife on occasion...4YO: Hey dad, you want to touch my nickels?
Me: Huh?
4YO: My nickels, want to touch them?
Me: How many nickels do you have?
4YO: Two.
Me: Where’d you find nickels?
4YO: I didn’t find them, I’ve always had them.
Me: Oh, you mean nipples. And no, they’re kinda private. I’m not going to touch them.
4YO: Private like my penis?
Me: you got it buddy.
4YO: Want to touch that?
My five-year-old asked me why I wasn't having a slice of the cake my wife had bought. I told him that I had diabetes and that I couldn't eat that stuff or I'd get sicker.
He said, "You're already fat and will die very soon."
My 10 year old discovered deez nuts jokes this school year as well. His Nana is named Dee... she HATES the jokes.KanilJr (11) started middleschool this year and discovered "deez nuts" jokes. Most of the time they don't make sense or are just stupid
Kid's got taste and timing.Had the weekend video call with my Mom in her assisted living place. My 5-year old learned to sing This Land is Your Land in school and has been singing it nonstop. So I said,”why don’t you sing your favorite song for grandma, Tater.”
Kid gets right up in the camera and sings,”Bah Bah DUDE LOOKS LIKE A LADY!”
My mistake. That’s on me.
Kid is 12 now and the exact conversation still happens.I'm at the point with my 4yo now where we have this conversation:3 year old son: Guess what?
Me: What:
3 year old son: ChickenButt! (followed immediately by) Guess what?
Me: What?
3 year old son: Chicken-poopy-butt! (followed immediately by)
Me:
A good poop joke gets me every time
KanilJr: Guess What?
Me: Chicken Butt
KanilJr: NO DAD I'M NOT TELLING THAT JOKE ANYMORE!
Daughters fiancéMy daughters fiancé was here for dinner and he replied to someone that he wasn’t just marrying Olivia, he was marrying everyone. #8, 12yo boy says “wow, talk about getting to know the family”
going back and rereading some of this thread has been amazing. Genuinely amazing. All the loves to all of you parents for sharing this stuff.
Lol....Cliffhanger?My daughter was doing paperwork for first job. She wanted to put my wife's social security number for payroll stuff. We told her she needed to put hers down. She explained she could put my wife's instead by saying, " I can use yours if it's consensual." No sweetie consensual is a little di
Forgot to post this a couple weeks ago.I lay in bed at bedtime with my 10-year old son (while I still can!) after he reads a book (for school) and we listen to Headspace together.
A couple nights ago I was just looking at his sweet little face and he had this little grin. I couldn't tell if he was asleep and just smiling or if he was awake so I softly whispered "Bubba?" and he opened his eyes so I asked him what he was smiling at .
He said "I was just thinking of a fart-powered jet-pack" and closed his eyes.