Quiplash - Winner winner... (1 Viewer)

[hagmania]

Hey folks, your host with the most is back for a little Friday diversion. Sign ups for Quiplash start here - I've got a meeting that will last til 10:30 CT and then free for the rest of the day to get this all rolled out and tallied up. If you're in the game, be ready to send in your responses around lunchtime.

I'll be sending you three prompts to write a funny quip in response. You'll be in direct competition with other players until we move to the final round, a free-for-all quip where you're competing against all players. Points are awarded as judged by other folks.

In the spirit of the game, once you receive your prompts, try not to spend more than a minute or two on each response. Honor system and all.

Be brief, be funny, and be punctual!

1. fatguyinalittlecoat
2. AAABatteries
3. Foosball God
4. Idiot Boxer
5. Bob Sacamano
6. lardonastick
7. Cjw_55106
8. Worm

Programmer's note: Sorry about the abandoned EPYC game. Had more than I really wanted to be handling between work and other life stuff. We're good to go now, but not really digging that type of game for quick Friday fun.

 

[fatguyinalittlecoat]

In

 

[AAABatteries]

In

 

[AAABatteries]

Be brief, be funny, and be punctual!

After sex my wife always says "that was fast" and is laughing - I've got this!

 

[Foosball God]

In

 

[Idiot Boxer]

yes

 

[Bob Sacamano]

AAA's wife reacts that way to me, too.  Might as well.

 

[lardonastick]

Yes

 

[Cjw_55106]

Sure, why not? 

 

[Worm]

In!

 

[hagmania]

Last call - wrapping up and heading back over to my desk. Will roll out prompts at 10:30.

 

[hagmania]

All prompts have been sent. Let me know if you signed up but didn't receive anything.

 

[Idiot Boxer]

#NoShame

 

[Worm]

#shamefree

 

[Foosball God]

#NoShame

 

[Cjw_55106]

I was bad. 

 

[hagmania]

The #shame List

@AAABatteries - New Shame-Free Formula
@Bob Sacamano
@fatguyinalittlecoat

 

[AAABatteries]

Done - sorry

 

[hagmania]

Done - sorry

YOU BETTER BE!

 

[fatguyinalittlecoat]

Sorry was out haven't even opened the PM.  Will do so now if not too late.

 

[hagmania]

You're all good, send away. We can now focus our shame on Bobby.

 

[Nick Vermeil]

  

Stupid morning meetings.  

 

[hagmania]

  

Stupid morning meetings.  

I'll let you know ahead of time for the next Friday I have free.

You're welcome to stay around and send in votes to judge quips.

 

[Nick Vermeil]

I'll let you know ahead of time for the next Friday I have free.

You're welcome to stay around and send in votes to judge quips.

I accept and will judge harshly.  

 

[Bob Sacamano]

You're all good, send away. We can now focus our shame on Bobby.

I'm used to it. 

 

[Bob Sacamano]

@hagmania

Shame on me?  Shame on you!

https://media.tenor.co/images/2136cea1ec3d7e616bfe6027cfa1f18e/tenor.gif

 

[hagmania]

It is now my shame. Back from lunch. Compiling!

 

[Bob Sacamano]

I'm off to lunch.  Text me when you need votes.

 

[Willie Neslon]

yo

 

[hagmania]

Please PM me one vote for each Head-to-Head prompt, excluding prompts you participated in. For the Final Quip, send in a total of three (3) votes, doled out as you'd like. You can even give 3 or 2 votes to prompts. No, no voting for yourself in the Final Quip either. (I was onto you!)

Format votes like the following:
A 2
B 1
C me
...
Final 1 1 2

Head-to-Head

A. No one was surprised this new game show flopped, with a name like "Wheel of ________".
1. Foreskin
2. clothes we took from the homeless

B. Roger Goodell shocked the sports world when he announced the NFL's newest expansion team, the ________.
1. Guadalajara Wallhoppers
2. ##### Grabbers

C. Name a really good reason to break into your neighbor's house right now.
1. I'm about to go on a Netflix binge and I'm all out of Zima.
2. Steal his goal post construction plans.

D. The most boring use of a superpower ever.
1. Using your laser vision to heat up your frozen burrito.
2. Using X-Ray vision to see how much gas is left in your vehicle

E. You can spot this license plate in the new presidential motorcade.
1. P ON ME
2. AGNTORNG

F. What would be your first clue that your blind date was a circus performer?
1. When the waiter brings the meal and she starts spinning the plates on your shvantz.
2. The beard.

G. Tesla had to halt production on their self-driving car line after this incident occurred.
1. Rectum? It damn near killed em!
2. Car drove itself to the other side of the tracks to score some blow.

H. The Banks children were forever scarred when Mary Poppins pulled ______ out of her bag.
1. **** Van Dyke Dildo
2. naked Trump

Final Quip

Have you heard this company's new slogan? It's brutally honest. (Format: Company Name - Slogan)
1. Botox - Because your husband left you for a younger woman.
2. McDonalds - What are you gonna do, drive an extra five minutes to eat actual food?
3. Google - Keep using us or we'll spill all your darkest secrets.
4. Liverpool FC - YNSA - You'll Never Suck Alone
5. United Airlines: Drag your feet, lose your seat.
6. Google - The appearance of choice is what we do best!
7. Chick-fil-A - Eat Mor Chikin! (Unless it's Sunday, or your gay)
8. Virginia Slims - Killing Septuagenarian Feminists One Cigarette at a Time

 

[hagmania]

@AAABatteries @Bob Sacamano @Cjw_55106 @fatguyinalittlecoat @Foosball God @Idiot Boxer @lardonastick @Worm

Time to vote.

 

[Foosball God]

#NoShame

 

[Idiot Boxer]

Voted.

 

[Bob Sacamano]

Plenty of shame. 

Not the speedbump,  though

 

[hagmania]

Audience members are free to vote as well. Just send in the above format.

@Nick Vermeil @Willie Neslon @Ned

 

[Bob Sacamano]

I think I just voted against someone for a reason that I was informed was wrong last time I voted against probably that same person.

 

[Bob Sacamano]

Sorry worm

 

[Cjw_55106]

Oh, I'm #Shameless

 

[Idiot Boxer]

I think I just voted against someone for a reason that I was informed was wrong last time I voted against probably that same person.

 

[hagmania]

I think one answer is getting jobbed out here that could use a bit of love.

 

[Nick Vermeil]

Audience members are free to vote as well. Just send in the above format.

@Nick Vermeil @Willie Neslon @Ned

Inbox is full. 

 

[Cjw_55106]

I think one answer is getting jobbed out here that could use a bit of love.

It's mine isn't it? Its always mine. Tell me its mine. No, dont tell me. Ok, tell me. 

 

[Idiot Boxer]

I think one answer is getting jobbed out here that could use a bit of love.

I had a difficult time deciding between the two answers on "C"

 

[hagmania]

Inbox is full. 

Thanks, alleviated.

 

[hagmania]

I had a difficult time deciding between the two answers on "C"

No one went for the surefire softball answer. To sleep with his wife!

 

[Bob Sacamano]

Sorry GB. For some reason I have it in my mind that 7 letter plates max is universal.

 

[Idiot Boxer]

Sorry GB. For some reason I have it in my mind that 7 letter plates max is universal.

It might be Worm's you voted against.  I thought you'd voted against mine previously.  

 

[Bob Sacamano]

One of you screwy 8 letter plate people.

 

[hagmania]

It might be Worm's you voted against.  I thought you'd voted against mine previously.  

You have quite the eye for people's humors.

 

[hagmania]

Was one of my more solid rounds for prompts tbqf. Could still use improvement obv.