IMO the NFL (on some level) really did give the "5 minute warmup" message, They wanted to finish the game but then the coaches and players decided to go to the locker rooms and not finish instead. What would the NFL do if they ordered the players to finish the game and they refused?
Goodell should make a decision tomorrow. It doesn't matter which bad choice he makes, just make one.
I think you're almost certainly right. In my charitable interpretation of things, it goes like this:
Ref: We had a long stoppage of play, but the ambulance has left the stadium.
NFL: Thanks. Okay coaches, tell your players to get limbered up. We'll resume in 5 minutes just like we always have.
McDermott and Taylor: Hey, hold on a sec. This was way worse than a normal injury. Trust us -- our players aren't prepared to play, and they won't be any time tonight.
NFL: Are you absolutely sure?
McD/T: Yep. Our players are really messed up right now.
NFL: Okay, fine. Let's call it a night and we'll sort it out in the morning.
This is fine, and would be a good example of an organization working well. We weren't there and didn't see what happened on the field. I'll defer to the professionals, who I trust.
But that was Monday night. Everybody should be okay by now. I get that some players are still grieving, but we're firmly into "life goes on" territory now. Honestly, if this were any team but my own, I would have no problem saying that you play on Sunday or you forfeit, and that includes your game check. Blue collar workers show up for work the next day when somebody dies on the job. Pro athletes are extremely well compensated and can do the same.