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*** OFFICIAL *** Jerky Boys appreciation thread (1 Viewer)

"Do you sell golf shoes?"

"yes"

"The kind with spikes?"

"yes"

"Do you think I could come over there and you could put some on and walk around on my back and kick my ###?"

"uh...hang on..."

<switch to speakerphone>

"...now say that again?" (coworkers giggling)

"Do you sell golf shoes?"

"yes" (snickering)

"The kind with spikes?"

"uh huh" (giggle giggle

"Do you think I could come try some on, to make sure they fit right?"

"......"

 
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"You on the ball there son? I'm asking you a question about a song and you don't even know that. You wanna go on Jeopardy?"

:D

 
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:lmao:

Jerky Boy: Should I bring my ####### tools?

Garage Owner: What?

JB: Should I bring my tool box?

GO: Why don’t you call me tomorrow?

JB: I’ll tell you what. I’ll come down tomorrow, I’ll start work tomorrow…I’ll work circles around you. I’ll rap your ####### head in with a ratchet. You don’t have anyone down there like me. I’ll be down tomorrow.

GO: Yeah, right

JB: So I’ll see you tomorrow with my tools. ####face.

 
Is it possible then to sue you people?

Sue who?

You.

Me? Sue Me? What for?

Well, for punitive damages...

 
:lmao: Jerky Boy: Should I bring my ####### tools? Garage Owner: What? JB: Should I bring my tool box? GO: Why don't you call me tomorrow? JB: I'll tell you what. I'll come down tomorrow, I'll start work tomorrow…I'll work circles around you. I'll rap your ####### head in with a ratchet. You don't have anyone down there like me. I'll be down tomorrow. GO: Yeah, right JB: So I'll see you tomorrow with my tools. ####face.
:bag: :lmao: :bag:
 
:kicksrock:

Jerky Boy: Should I bring my ####### tools?

Garage Owner: What?

JB: Should I bring my tool box?

GO: Why don’t you call me tomorrow?

JB: I’ll tell you what. I’ll come down tomorrow, I’ll start work tomorrow…I’ll work circles around you. I’ll rap your ####### head in with a ratchet. You don’t have anyone down there like me. I’ll be down tomorrow.

GO: Yeah, right

JB: So I’ll see you tomorrow with my tools. ####face.
"I used to work in Bakersfield, for Mears's gang. I fixed race cars!"
 
we had a very long thread here with tons of great jerky boys quotes, but I can't find it. guess it might have been purged.

:kicksrock:

 
UNCLE FREDDIE DIED? Oh my goodness. Martha, Uncle Freddie Died! Oh, i'm gonna... You're in trouble now! I'm gonna come there and I'm gonna break your ####### legs, you killed Uncle Freddie! They killed Uncle Freddie! They killed him, you ######!

 
UNCLE FREDDIE DIED? Oh my goodness. Martha, Uncle Freddie Died! Oh, i'm gonna... You're in trouble now! I'm gonna come there and I'm gonna break your ####### legs, you killed Uncle Freddie! They killed Uncle Freddie! They killed him, you ######!
One of my favorites!
 
We can't forget about Tarbash the Egyptian Magician.

It's tearing the ### out of me.

You got paint work, you need paint work, whattaya got?

Whattaya say I come over there we paint each other up?

At least 1 year of college was nothing but Jerky Boy quotes.

 
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10 User(s) are reading this topic (0 Guests and 1 Anonymous Users)

9 Members: Hoh, saintfool, Limp Ditka, Sol Rosenberg, Johnny Ryall, Gator Shawn, porkins, harrycarey, oddball

:moneybag:

 
From their Wiki entry...

# Frank Rizzo - an extremely abrasive blue-collar Italian-American New Yorker with bizarre complaints and requests (voiced by Brennan). (not to be confused with the 1972-1980 Philadelphia mayor, Frank Rizzo)
ETA: wouldn't it be great if it was former mayor (1972-1980) of Philadelphia, Frank Rizzo?
 
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:lmao:

Jerky Boy: Should I bring my ####### tools?

Garage Owner: What?

JB: Should I bring my tool box?

GO: Why don’t you call me tomorrow?

JB: I’ll tell you what. I’ll come down tomorrow, I’ll start work tomorrow…I’ll work circles around you. I’ll rap your ####### head in with a ratchet. You don’t have anyone down there like me. I’ll be down tomorrow.

GO: Yeah, right

JB: So I’ll see you tomorrow with my tools. ####face.
"I used to work in Bakersfield, for Mears's gang. I fixed race cars!"
Which Mears? The one that races now or the one that got ripped off by Trevor?
 
Rizzo: "...So, how many balloons do you think it will take to hold up a 65 pound punk? What are we talking about two tree hundred balloons?"

Clerk: *laughing* "Yeah, that ought to do it."

Rizzo: "I just thought we'd show the kid a good time you know. Maybe float him around the joint...the dog nipping at his feet maybe let the kids use him like a pinata. Hell, I might take a wack at the little #### myself!"

_________________________________________

RIZZO: "Say, you sound like you got a pair of them bologna #### there."

_________________________________________

Woman: "Hello"

SOL: "Hello?

Woman: "Hello...."

SOL: "Yes..."

Woman: "I'm calling to see if you still have the lawn chairs for sale."

SOL: "Hold on, let me go check...."

*Sound of a loud crash, some tumbling and a dog yelping*

SOL: "OH CHRIST!"

*We hear Sol moaning in pain and he slowly comes back to the phone.*

SOL: "OH....Oh God...."

Woman: "Are you alright?"

SOL: "I don't think I can walk no more..."

Woman: "What happened?"

SOL: "I had a terrible fall...I can see a piece of the bone sticking out......OW OW!"

Woman: "Do you need me to call an ambulance?"

SOL: :"Oh no...don't you be so worrisome about me."

 
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