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What Song Was Playing During Your Very First Slow Dance / Wedding "First Dance"? (18/30) (1 Viewer)

GordonGekko

Footballguy
Direct Headline: Neural Nostalgia Why do we love the music we heard as teenagers?

BY MARK JOSEPH STERN AUG 12, 2014

...Why do the songs I heard when I was teenager sound sweeter than anything I listen to as an adult? .... In recent years, psychologists and neuroscientists have confirmed that these songs hold disproportionate power over our emotions. And researchers have uncovered evidence that suggests our brains bind us to the music we heard as teenagers more tightly than anything we’ll hear as adults—a connection that doesn’t weaken as we age. Musical nostalgia, in other words, isn’t just a cultural phenomenon: It’s a neuronic command. And no matter how sophisticated our tastes might otherwise grow to be, our brains may stay jammed on those songs we obsessed over during the high drama of adolescence....

....When we first hear a song, it stimulates our auditory cortex and we convert the rhythms, melodies, and harmonies into a coherent whole. From there, our reaction to music depends on how we interact with it. Sing along to a song in your head, and you’ll activate your premotor cortex, which helps plan and coordinate movements. Dance along, and your neurons will synchronize with the beat of the music. Pay close attention to the lyrics and instrumentation, and you’ll activate your parietal cortex, which helps you shift and maintain attention to different stimuli. Listen to a song that triggers personal memories, and your prefrontal cortex, which maintains information relevant to your personal life and relationships, will spring into action... Brain imaging studies show that our favorite songs stimulate the brain’s pleasure circuit, which releases an influx of dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, and other neurochemicals that make us feel good. The more we like a song, the more we get treated to neurochemical bliss, flooding our brains with some of the same neurotransmitters that cocaine chases after.....

....Music lights these sparks of neural activity in everybody. But in young people, the spark turns into a fireworks show. Between the ages of 12 and 22, our brains undergo rapid neurological development—and the music we love during that decade seems to get wired into our lobes for good. When we make neural connections to a song, we also create a strong memory trace that becomes laden with heightened emotion, thanks partly to a surfeit of pubertal growth hormones. These hormones tell our brains that everything is incredibly important—especially the songs that form the soundtrack to our teenage dreams ....“We are discovering music on our own for the first time when we’re young....often through our friends. We listen to the music they listen to as a badge, as a way of belonging to a certain social group. That melds the music to our sense of identity....”

....there may be another factor in play: the reminiscence bump, a name for the phenomenon that we remember so much of our younger adult lives more vividly than other years, and these memories last well into our senescence. According to the reminiscence bump theory, we all have a culturally conditioned “life script” that serves, in our memory, as the narrative of our lives. When we look back on our pasts, the memories that dominate this narrative have two things in common: They’re happy, and they cluster around our teens and early 20s...these songs form the soundtrack to what feel, at the time, like the most vital and momentous years of our lives. The music that plays during our first kiss, our first prom....gets attached to that memory and takes on a glimmer of its profundity. We may recognize in retrospect that prom wasn’t really all that profound. But even as the importance of the memory itself fades, the emotional afterglow tagged to the music lingers.....


https://slate.com/technology/2014/0...ong-preference-and-the-reminiscence-bump.html



VIDEO: How to Slow Dance With a Girl (Weddings, Proms, Parties) Sep 6, 2020

“You've gotta dance like there's nobody watching,
Love like you'll never be hurt,
Sing like there's nobody listening,
And live like it's heaven on earth.”


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S1qp7r99DcE



VIDEO: Roxette - It Must Have Been Love (Lyrics) Jun 12, 2011

"It Must Have Been Love", is a song written by Per Gessle and performed by the Swedish pop duo Roxette. The power ballad became the duo's third number one hit in the United States, and is one of their best selling releases, being certified gold or platinum in a number of countries. Four different versions of the song have been officially released. The original song was released in 1987, which was followed by the most successful incarnation, a slightly edited version, omitting the Christmas references, created for the soundtrack to the 1990 film Pretty Woman.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W_NzaxANiEo

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/It_Must_Have_Been_Love




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“And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music.”

- Friedrich Nietzsche


“Dancing is a perpendicular expression of a horizontal desire.”

- George Bernard Shaw




Here is another topic that is designed to increase discussion and participation in the FFA.

I see this as an interesting topic because it's a bit more lighthearted and that most everyone can relate to regarding an often easier, more simple and more dynamic time in their lives. Also this forum seems to be heavily invested in music and song discussion. There's close to no chance that this topic will shift into real world public policy issues, public administration conflict and generally anything politically related.

What song was playing during your first ever slow dance? Is there a backstory you want to share about the situation, event, the other person, etc, etc? Does that song still hold strong nostalgia value for you? How do you tend to feel and react when you hear it?

What song was playing during your "first dance" during your wedding reception? Or if married multiple times, then what songs were chosen. Did you choose the song? How do you tend to feel and react when you hear it? Does it hold heavy nostalgia value for you? Or might it have had the opposite effect? ( if the marriage ended and now the song drives you nuts) Is there a backstory to your wedding and the music played there that relates to this topic that you want to share?

For those not married, is there a song that you slow danced to that has some very powerful nostalgia for you? What song was it? How do you tend to feel and react when you hear it?

I am not married and have never been married. But I remember when I was a guest at a wedding long ago, and I met a single woman there. The bride sort to tried to play matchmaker there I suppose. We had a nice time and I remember dancing with her to Roxette's It Must Have Been Love. I do recall it in a very positive way because we ended up seeing each other for a decent stretch after the wedding. I remember her head on my shoulder. The way she laughed. The smell of her perfume. The way we moved. Hearing the song even today triggers memories of all of that again.

Lay a whisper on my pillow
Leave the winter on the ground
I wake up lonely
This air of silence
In the bedroom and all around


I'll leave this here for others to discuss. (18/30)
 
First slow dance: For most of my peers, it was probably Freebird; for me, the moment was such a blur that I don't even remember the song. I think it was Open Arms by Journey.

First song at my wedding reception: Unforgettable by Natalie and Nat King Cole. I had torn my hamstring a few days earlier so every turn was a new experience in pain.
 
I DJ’d some of the dances in HS, which really just meant playing songs my friends wanted and trying to set them up with the girls they liked. Worked well enough for them. (I was a great wingman)
Then one dance, a Buddy told me he wanted to take over for a couple songs to give me a break. I went to the bathroom, got a bite to eat and a coke. When I went back into the dance floor, he had convinced the girl I liked to walk over to me, he put on Somebody, Depeche Mode so we danced. That relationship didn’t go anywhere but I’ll always remember that dance.
 
Color My World was first slow dance at a private party in a freinds basment. That and Stairway to Heavan were the main slow dances in my time before disco.
 
I have no idea what was the first song I ever slow danced to, as I'm sure the physical distance between the girl and I was mathematically longer than the length of my outstretched arms. As for our wedding song, our song was "I Could Not Ask For More" by Edwin McCain. We got married in 2000, and I believe that song was a big hit in '99 or so. My wife and I had been friends for years before we started dating, and then it was a quick progression to engagement and a wedding less than a year later. That song just seemed to sum up what we both felt about how our relationship developed. I'm sure that dude's got more play at wedding in the last 25 years than he has anywhere else. But every once in awhile, I'll pop ol' Eddie into the CD player and we'll do a slow dance in the kitchen for old times' sake.
 
5th grade Halloween party over at some girls house. Down in the basement, aww yeah.

Total Eclipse of The Heart, and I make my move on Gabby the new girl from Texas. 4 minutes of making out.

I was pretty slick for a 5th grader
 
Color My World

that was STILL the number one slow dance choice by the time it was "our" turn to dominate the CYO dances - maybe close to a decade after it's release, but still going strong.

i jumped the gun, tho ... i asked Mr. DJ if he could spin "Love Hurts", and he obliged - CMW retained it's status as the last dance of that night, but i made my move prior to all the pressure being squarely on that one 'ask', and it paid off quite well.

the aromas of Pert shampoo mixed with Big Red chewing gum, she had.

will always remember.
 

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