WTF is wrong with people/am I overreacting? (1 Viewer)

[KarmaPolice]

Long story short, my wife just got a job back in our area a couple months ago.  They did a belated welcome post on Facebook yesterday welcoming her to the clinic (she is a veterinarian).   She hates having her picture taken because she has struggled a bit with her weight, but she has lost a bit in the last year or so.  Was bullied a bit as a kid and encountered people at weddings, etc. that she has overheard.   

Anyway, in the middle of all the congrats and welcome posts is THIS meme/GIF, so she is in the other room upset and crying.   No post, no context, and 0 clue who this guy is who posted it.  

So, question stands - WTF is wrong with people?  OR is there any possible other interpretation to this besides what we think it means?

 

[El Floppo]

Hopefully going with animals/vet theme rather than miserable childish ahole making fun of somebody

 

[rockaction]

Hopefully going with animals/vet theme rather than miserable childish ahole making fun of somebody

I was hoping this, too. Probably the first animal gif on someone's phone. I find it hard to believe they're making fun of her weight. That would indeed be low.

 

[caustic]

Hopefully going with animals/vet theme rather than miserable childish ahole making fun of somebody

My thoughts as well - possible that they just picked a silly animal gif to reply to the vet. I was expecting much worse when I clicked on the link.

 

[shadyridr]

Huh? Think your reading way too much into this. Someone posted a funny gif of a dog on a vet's facebook page. 

 

[AAABatteries]

Obviously no way to know the posters intent but I wouldn’t have thought it was about your wife’s weight if you had not provided that context and her reaction.

 

[Nipsey]

It's a dumb gif of a dog in a hoodie eating with a spoon. Don't see it as meaning anything malicious.

 

[El Floppo]

Not that more reasons are needed, but exhibit 234c of why not to bother with fb.

i hope the mrs feels better, gb kp

 

[need2know]

Seems like overreacting to me

 

[comfortably numb]

Another vote for insecurity 

 

[Don Quixote]

I think overreacting. Just a dog meme.

 

[jhib]

So, question stands - WTF is wrong with people?  OR is there any possible other interpretation to this besides what we think it means?

Silly/funny gif of a happy dog celebrating your wife coming to his clinic by partying & eating ice cream?

I mean, maybe.  I can see why your wife might have taken it in that negative way.  But with the lack of context or explanation, I tend to choose to assume the best of others in that kind of situation rather than the worst.  I mean, you get to interpret it anyway you want, so might as well go with the way that makes you happiest.

 

[joffer]

that’s cute

 

[KarmaPolice]

Fair points, just hard for her to distance from the teasing and pain I guess.   At her sister's wedding just 2 years ago she said she overheard somebody talking about her weight and laughing that she was dancing.  

I know zip about gifs and memes, and usually don't think the are funny - so I was no help in thinking of something that was less #######-ish, so I am sure I fed the fire a little bit.  

 

[DallasDMac]

The dog doesn't look overweight. Seems like is reading something in to it that isn't there. Understandable given her history I guess. But boy, seems at some point she'd be well served to move past that. Not making anyone miserable but herself. Well, you I guess.

 

[KarmaPolice]

Also is Bipolar 2, mostly in the depression end of it and struggles a ton with this stuff.   Thanks for the input though guys - I too try to err on the side of the position you are taking, but it was hard tonight with how upset she was and how much I hate sites like FB to begin with.  

 

[matuski]

Huh? Think your reading way too much into this. Someone posted a funny gif of a dog on a vet's facebook page. 

This

 

[That one guy]

If the person who posted the gif is an unknown, how could it be an insult?  

 

[DallasDMac]

Also is Bipolar 2, mostly in the depression end of it and struggles a ton with this stuff.   Thanks for the input though guys - I too try to err on the side of the position you are taking, but it was hard tonight with how upset she was and how much I hate sites like FB to begin with.  

Given her mental state, it would seem social media is the worst possible thing for your wife. But yea, I realize their is no way she'll ever get off of it.

 

[shadyridr]

Also is Bipolar 2, mostly in the depression end of it and struggles a ton with this stuff.   Thanks for the input though guys - I too try to err on the side of the position you are taking, but it was hard tonight with how upset she was and how much I hate sites like FB to begin with.  

Sorry to hear that

Tell her to stay off Facebook. No good can come from it. 

 

[jvdesigns2002]

Also is Bipolar 2, mostly in the depression end of it and struggles a ton with this stuff.   Thanks for the input though guys - I too try to err on the side of the position you are taking, but it was hard tonight with how upset she was and how much I hate sites like FB to begin with.  

Social media is a giant cesspool or toilet.  I agree with you  on that.  For somebody that might be battling bi-polar issues and depression—I’d for sure recommend from refraining from social media as much as possible. With that said—I’m not sure if I think there was any maliciousness intended with the dog video. However—intent is not always required to trigger somebody’s emotions or sensitivities.  I think we’ve all said or did something with good or funny intentions that ended up being misinterpreted or backfiring. 

 

[KarmaPolice]

If the person who posted the gif is an unknown, how could it be an insult?  

Her picture was on the article, and like I said, she is hyper-paranoid about her weight and how she looks.  

 

[KarmaPolice]

Like I said - I didn't get it either.  Dont think it's funny, 0 clue what its eating, just a dumb video of a dog stuffing its face.  

I have a co-manager that posts gifts and memes all the time that I think are dumb as hell too.  Just too old.  

 

[tjnc09]

"WTF is wrong with people" also applies perfectly to everyone overreacting to EVERYTHING

 

[KarmaPolice]

"WTF is wrong with people" also applies perfectly to everyone overreacting to EVERYTHING

 

[Tanner9919]

Long story short, my wife just got a job back in our area a couple months ago.  They did a belated welcome post on Facebook yesterday welcoming her to the clinic (she is a veterinarian).   She hates having her picture taken because she has struggled a bit with her weight, but she has lost a bit in the last year or so.  Was bullied a bit as a kid and encountered people at weddings, etc. that she has overheard.   

Anyway, in the middle of all the congrats and welcome posts is THIS meme/GIF, so she is in the other room upset and crying.   No post, no context, and 0 clue who this guy is who posted it.  

So, question stands - WTF is wrong with people?  OR is there any possible other interpretation to this besides what we think it means?

'WTF is wrong with people' might actually apply to you guys..get a thick skin for pete's sake. I don't think anyone meant anything malicious with that fb post. sheesh.

 

[Mrs. Rannous]

My thoughts as well - possible that they just picked a silly animal gif to reply to the vet. I was expecting much worse when I clicked on the link.

That's the way I see it.  I doubt it occurred to the poster that your wife might even be overweight.  It's just a stupid dog video.

I think maybe it's time for your wife to revisit therapy and a review of her bipolar treatment.  And maybe no more FB.

 

[Leroy Hoard]

Not that more reasons are needed, but exhibit 234c of why not to bother with fb.

 

[KarmaPolice]

I think maybe it's time for your wife to revisit therapy and a review of her bipolar treatment.  And maybe no more FB

She is has never stopped.  I wish to the last part.  

 

[KarmaPolice]

'WTF is wrong with people' might actually apply to you guys..get a thick skin for pete's sake. I don't think anyone meant anything malicious with that fb post. sheesh.

Yeah, this is why I was hesitant posting anything, but whatever.  

We didn't post anything on FB, call him out, etc.   

I guess I hope the lesson learned is a bit on the other side- we all have different histories, backgrounds, traumas.   Nothing to do with "thick skin".  

 

[rockaction]

She is has never stopped.  I wish to the last part.  

Is FB a mandatory part of her practice, GB, or is she just on it as a social endeavor? Just curious. I find myself hyper-sensitive to certain things in social media yet I continue them, so I sympathize with her. It's a way to stay connected even with its drawbacks.

 

[rockaction]

I guess I hope the lesson learned is a bit on the other side- we all have different histories, backgrounds, traumas.   Nothing to do with "thick skin".  

They call this, a little antiquated but still as a term of art, the 'eggshell plaintiff' in law school regarding torts and suits. Not everybody brings the same backgrounds or traumas or abilities to cope as the next. Again, I hope this wasn't too traumatic and that she's able to T. Swift it and Shake It Off.

 

[KarmaPolice]

Is FB a mandatory part of her practice, GB, or is she just on it as a social endeavor? Just curious. I find myself hyper-sensitive to certain things in social media yet I continue them, so I sympathize with her. It's a way to stay connected even with its drawbacks.

Social.  

We are fairly isolated, so that is her connection to people, but she does know that it drives her mad sometimes.  

She knows her therapist will tell her the same thing as the posts here, I just also needed to hear it to.  Just painful to see those triggers pushed, and I reacted a bit too.  

 

[KarmaPolice]

They call this, a little antiquated but still as a term of art, the 'eggshell plaintiff' in law school regarding torts and suits. Not everybody brings the same backgrounds or traumas or abilities to cope as the next. Again, I hope this wasn't too traumatic and that she's able to T. Swift it and Shake It Off.

This is the part that I dont think will happen, unfortunately.  

 

[Otis]

Yeah you guys are reading wayyyyy too much into this. 

 

[Dickies]

Yeah, this is why I was hesitant posting anything, but whatever.  

We didn't post anything on FB, call him out, etc.   

I guess I hope the lesson learned is a bit on the other side- we all have different histories, backgrounds, traumas.   Nothing to do with "thick skin".  

If she has/is struggling with depression, it’s really not an overreaction or “get thicker skin” scenario. 

 

[Kal El]

It seems like the poster wanted to post a funny dog gif, and likely didn't mean anything nefarious by it. Granted, there are funnier dog gifs, but I doubt they were insinuating anything about her relative health.

 

[rockaction]

Social.  

We are fairly isolated, so that is her connection to people, but she does know that it drives her mad sometimes.  

She knows her therapist will tell her the same thing as the posts here, I just also needed to hear it to.  Just painful to see those triggers pushed, and I reacted a bit too.  

I hear ya. Watch, it'll turn out the guy really was being a jerk or something. Who knows? I'm sure that possibility is what's driving this. People can be so brutal without a thought. I'll see myself out here. Best of luck, GB.

 

[Dan Lambskin]

I think you guys are barking up the wrong tree

 

[Leroy Hoard]

It seems like the poster wanted to post a funny dog gif, and likely didn't mean anything nefarious by it. Granted, there are funnier dog gifs, but I doubt they were insinuating anything about her relative health.

This one might have been better.

https://wanna-joke.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/funny-gif-dog-at-vet-reaction.gif

 

[fruity pebbles]

Yeah, I had to think about it as to why she’d even be offended. Guess cause the dogs eating. Was expecting a pig or something honestly. I’m 100% sure this person meant no harm. You’d have to be a sociopath to publicly insult your new coworkers weight in a welcome post. 

 

[El Floppo]

Yeah, I had to think about it as to why she’d even be offended. Guess cause the dogs eating. Was expecting a pig or something honestly. I’m 100% sure this person meant no harm. You’d have to be a sociopath to publicly insult your new coworkers weight in a welcome post. 

To he fair, it was a post on FB, so I'd almost expect as much.

 

[shadyridr]

Yeah, I had to think about it as to why she’d even be offended. Guess cause the dogs eating. Was expecting a pig or something honestly. I’m 100% sure this person meant no harm. You’d have to be a sociopath to publicly insult your new coworkers weight in a welcome post. 

Don't think it was a coworker just a random Facebook follower

 

[KarmaPolice]

I hear ya. Watch, it'll turn out the guy really was being a jerk or something. Who knows? I'm sure that possibility is what's driving this. People can be so brutal without a thought. I'll see myself out here. Best of luck, GB.

Yeah, I had to think about it as to why she’d even be offended. Guess cause the dogs eating. Was expecting a pig or something honestly. I’m 100% sure this person meant no harm. You’d have to be a sociopath to publicly insult your new coworkers weight in a welcome post. 

Mostly my post was a fishing trip to see what other opinions of the gif were.  Like I said, I don't think they are funny and don't see many, but there was also no context or other worded post like "congrats" or "it's a party" - whatever.  

Not co-worker, friend, or anybody else she has ever seen in at any clinic.   Part of the equation is that she went down the rabbit hole of poking around on his FB page, and let's just say that it's not a 0% chance it was a post with no ill intent.  It's the exact type of person I avoid social media for.   Now, I fully admit that chances are it was just a dumb gif, but looking at that added to the equation for sure.   She would have been able to not get as worked up if it was just some cute old lady that posts a lot of dumb pictures of pets.  

 

[Kal El]

This one might have been better.

https://wanna-joke.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/funny-gif-dog-at-vet-reaction.gif

It definitely was.

 

[KarmaPolice]

This one might have been better.

https://wanna-joke.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/funny-gif-dog-at-vet-reaction.gif

See, that is actually funny.  

 

[parasaurolophus]

Wtf? 

I was expecting something waaaay different. 

 

[Osaurus]

I don’t see it, but it’s not me. I’ve seen better memes too.

 

[simey]

Yeah, this is why I was hesitant posting anything, but whatever.  

We didn't post anything on FB, call him out, etc.   

I guess I hope the lesson learned is a bit on the other side- we all have different histories, backgrounds, traumas.   Nothing to do with "thick skin".  

I understand why she is hypersensitive to the gif. One of my best friends has been overweight since I met her in college. I have heard people make comments in grocery stores, bars, and even yelling insults out a car window about her weight. She never reacted to those comments, but I know it hurt her.  I did react the time some lowlifes yelled derogatory things to her out their car window. We were all walking into a convenience store, and I was the last to walk in, but turned around and walked up to the car that was sitting at a stop light, and I ripped them a new #######. I'm sure it didn't faze them, but it helped to relieve my anger of their hatefulness. She never knew I did it.  Anyway, the hurtful name calling I am sure left scars.

Her weight grew over the years, partly from having a thyroid disease, and partly from overeating and drinking alcohol. She is big boned too, and can't carry her weight well. Everyone in her family is overweight. She has depression as well, and medication can also cause weight gain. About 8 years ago she had gastric bypass surgery. She now is still considered a bit overweight, but no longer obese. She is comfortable in her skin, yet still does battle depression at times.

Your wife's bipolar I'm sure intensifies things. My SIL has borderline personality disorder, which has some of the symptoms of bipolar (which she was originally diagnosed with). Things will trigger her, and sometimes what she thinks is happening or has happened, is not what was meant or happened, but in her world it was meant and happened the way she perceived it. Her reality is not always everyone elses. I can understand why she would perceive a dog gorging itself on food as some type of dig on her weight based on her history of being made fun of due to her weight, and being emotionally fragile with her mental illness. I'm not saying that people with bipolar are always emotionally fragile, but I would think a new job would bring some anxiety and stress, and that could certainly make her vulnerable to triggers and an episode. More than likely someone thought she would think the dog gif was funny, and it was an innocent thing that was just stupid. My nephews are always spamming me with idiotic gifs. I don't even understand half of them.

I hope she will consider it was probably a stupid joke with no ill intentions, and she will settle in well with her new job. There are a bunch of animals that need her help, compassion, and love. It's time for Dr Dolittle to spread her love in her new clinic.

 

[Mrs. Rannous]

Not co-worker, friend, or anybody else she has ever seen in at any clinic.   

I don't understand.  (Not surprising- I don't do FB.)  How would the troll know what your wife looked like to be insulting?  Or find the forum it posted on?